FB Post from August 31, 2016
STILL number two on the waiting list. That means two more placements need to take place before we can begin our home study and actually be presented to expectant mothers. We have been in the same place "in line" since March. WAITING IS SO HARD! I'm so torn about how to feel about this situation. It is great that there are less babies being born whose mothers feel their best option is adoption, but at the same time ht makes me sad that our wait continues. I KNOW, God has a plan for us. I trust in that, I really do, but I guess I need to pray for a bit more patience during this wait. We were put on the waiting list in December. In eight months we have moved up two spots. So potentially, we may wait eight more months before we are even able to be presented. Being presented, does not give you any order of being chosen, it just lets you be one of the 15 hopefully adoptive families waiting to be chosen. If you aren't the first one chosen, a new hopeful family is thrown into the mix, always keeping that number at 15. Now, do you understand a little more about why this makes me feel like our dream is "forever" away from us? We can go with a larger agency, that isn't local, but most often, the cost goes up even more with those agencies. Now, if we find an expectant mother on our own and are able to set up a private adoption, the cost goes down and we can get our home study done right away (well, in the three months it is taking our state to get things finished). So, if you know someone considering adoption, please share our story with them.
On a lighter and much more exciting note, my dear friend Cara just held a Younique fundraiser for me. We didn't do as well as I hoped we would, but I was busy with back-to-school craziness so I don't think I put in as much effort as I should have (sorry Cara). But, do you want to know how sweet my dear Cara is? She not only donated all of her commission to our adoption, but she is matching that amount with her personal funds and donating it to us. CARA, YOU ARE AN ANGEL!!! So, if you ever need some Younique products, my friend Cara is your girl and I would be extremely happy to give you her contact info.
Last couple of thoughts for the evening:
-We have been busy caring for my father-in-law since January, so I know the updates have been slow. Since we really haven't moved much on the wait list, there wasn't a ton to tell, so we made him a priority over blogging. He is in good hands right now, so hopefully blogging will become more consistent.
-My last update included some transparency and shared exciting news about our new home...I'm hoping to put up some pictures in the future, but checking into what is truly safe to put online during this process.
Have a great night!
Alicia
Wednesday, August 31, 2016
Transparency
Originally Posted on our FB page on June 24th, 2016
A Little Transparency:
For YEARS I have been "throwing away" money on rent. Don't get me wrong, it is something I had to do. I had to keep a roof over my head, not just for me, but for my son. A little background information: when my son turned two my ex-husband moved out and I spent ten years being a single mom. A single mom with a child and for many of those years, a minimum wage job. On one income I had $65000+ in student loans, a car payment to get me to and from work, rent on my own and all utilities to pay with just my income. It seemed I always made just enough that I didn't qualify for help, yet had a very, very hard time paying all of my bills with money to spare. Not to mention, previous debt from my marriage and a child with special medical needs that involved expensive medicine. Needless to say, my credit went to crap. Since meeting Steve, I have worked REALLY hard at rebuilding my credit. My lack of credit is why I can't just "charge" the costs of the adoption and why I didn't own a house (which is also why we couldn't refinance our home to pay for our adoption). AND that is why Steve and I have been renting. I am in a much better financial place now, have been teaching at my current position for four full years (much better pay) and have completely rebuilt my credit. So, no more throwing away money on rent. We bought a house in May, pay a mortgage very comparable to what our rent was, and are now able to build equity in case something would happen in the future and we would have to borrow against it. Now, I was very reluctant to post this information since many people are quick to judge when people trying to save and raise money to adopt make purchases such as houses and cars. That is why I want to make it clear though that our mortgage is right in line with what we were paying in rent and never would have gotten any return on it in the future.
The timing is perfect though, considering we are still on the wait list to start our home study and be able to be "shown" to prospective birth mothers. If we had bought a house after that process started, then it would have cost up to $500 just to update the home study since a caseworker needs to come out to the house, look at everything, and update all of the paperwork. We closed on the house at the end of May and once school was out Steve and I started working on updating things in the house and painting almost every room in the house. By the way, this house gives us more room to bring a little one (or two if we get matched with twins) home. We will officially begin moving our things in next week!
This waiting to get our case started is HARD! I will fill you in on those details in my next post, but that is part of why I haven't posted much. There just isn't a lot of new news and it is frustrating for us. We are continuing to save and build our adoption fund.
More to come....
Alicia
A Little Transparency:
For YEARS I have been "throwing away" money on rent. Don't get me wrong, it is something I had to do. I had to keep a roof over my head, not just for me, but for my son. A little background information: when my son turned two my ex-husband moved out and I spent ten years being a single mom. A single mom with a child and for many of those years, a minimum wage job. On one income I had $65000+ in student loans, a car payment to get me to and from work, rent on my own and all utilities to pay with just my income. It seemed I always made just enough that I didn't qualify for help, yet had a very, very hard time paying all of my bills with money to spare. Not to mention, previous debt from my marriage and a child with special medical needs that involved expensive medicine. Needless to say, my credit went to crap. Since meeting Steve, I have worked REALLY hard at rebuilding my credit. My lack of credit is why I can't just "charge" the costs of the adoption and why I didn't own a house (which is also why we couldn't refinance our home to pay for our adoption). AND that is why Steve and I have been renting. I am in a much better financial place now, have been teaching at my current position for four full years (much better pay) and have completely rebuilt my credit. So, no more throwing away money on rent. We bought a house in May, pay a mortgage very comparable to what our rent was, and are now able to build equity in case something would happen in the future and we would have to borrow against it. Now, I was very reluctant to post this information since many people are quick to judge when people trying to save and raise money to adopt make purchases such as houses and cars. That is why I want to make it clear though that our mortgage is right in line with what we were paying in rent and never would have gotten any return on it in the future.
The timing is perfect though, considering we are still on the wait list to start our home study and be able to be "shown" to prospective birth mothers. If we had bought a house after that process started, then it would have cost up to $500 just to update the home study since a caseworker needs to come out to the house, look at everything, and update all of the paperwork. We closed on the house at the end of May and once school was out Steve and I started working on updating things in the house and painting almost every room in the house. By the way, this house gives us more room to bring a little one (or two if we get matched with twins) home. We will officially begin moving our things in next week!
This waiting to get our case started is HARD! I will fill you in on those details in my next post, but that is part of why I haven't posted much. There just isn't a lot of new news and it is frustrating for us. We are continuing to save and build our adoption fund.
More to come....
Alicia
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